Stephen's Right Hand Accident Journal
On 14th January 2023 I was finishing some DIY in my garden using a circular saw which I have confidently and safely used for years. This time, it hit resistance in the wood and within a fraction of a second, it jumped and swung out of control across my right hand. I looked down to see all 4 of my fingers severed, attached minimally by just a few millimetres of skin at the bases. My little finger was fully detached on the floor having been completely severed from my hand. Blood was flowing quickly and my body went into shock.
I was alone, but I managed to get my neighbour’s attention as luckily her back door was open from letting out her dog. Within 7 minutes the ambulance arrived (during a period of ambulance strikes) which was extremely lucky, and I was taken to Wexham Park Hospital, a renowned specialist centre for hand and plastic surgery. Luckily this hospital is 7-8 minutes from my home and with blood supply failing, time was an important factor in the chances of saving any fingers.
I went into surgery for eight hours to have the bones wired together as they were completely fractured, flexor tendons (palm side) and extensor tendons (back of hand side) repaired, blood vessels and nerves reconstructed. My thumb was unaffected by the injury. I was warned by one of the surgeons when I woke up that the blood supply was failing to my little finger and it was unlikely to survive. My index finger was also failing to re-establish circulation out from it, causing congestion and it could also fail to survive, but I was told the other repairs to middle and ring finger were all successful at this stage. My finger nail was removed from the index finger and medical leeches were attached to my nail bed to draw blood through, allowing fresh blood to enter the finger and keep it alive. It took 13 days and nights of this, until eventually it became strong enough to sustain circulation by itself without leeches. It has however, permanent nerve and tendon damage so sensation of the index finger is now greatly reduced on one side. By day five my little finger was showing no sign of improvement and the tissue was dying. I was taken to surgery to have it amputated on the 19th Jan which was a very difficult day for me.
When discharged, I started an intensive hand therapy programme, led by my occupational therapist Gaby Willis. For months it took up at least 3 hours each day and at the peak I was spending up to 6 hours per day on exercises, scar tissue massage and protocols to help re-establish movement patterns. I was determined to give myself the best chance for a successful recovery as the subsequent hand therapy is as important as the surgery itself in final outcome. At first, I didn’t think I would be able to play the piano again, but naturally, I wanted to begin trying to play as soon as possible. I had to relearn from the beginning, at first I barely had the strength or movement range to push a key but as I healed I gradually felt improvement in touch control, strength, span, dexterity and speed.
However, I was coming to terms with the loss and grief of losing a finger and the realisation of losing all of my repertoire and years of work/ skill in an instant was devastating. It felt like a huge part of who I was had been removed from me, including part of my expressive personality. I was grieving this loss along with that of grieving the physical loss of a finger. I believed that the majority of the repertoire that I knew I will no longer have the ability to play in the same way that I once did, but I had to stay positive and I knew that with perseverance there would be so much music that I will be able to play, and that was my challenge. I was still teaching and this experience, while not being able to play was frustrating and challenging. I had moments when I wasn’t sure whether to turn away from music and look for a new career.
I had more surgery in December 2023 to release scar tissue on my 4th finger which was restricting it from bending significantly. This has been a success, and I now have a very good function from my right hand. My surgeons and hand therapist are amazed at how well I have done as they couldn’t predict what my outcome would be with a complex injury of that nature and the amount of damage and repairs. I am extremely lucky to have a wonderful hand therapist, and surgeons who really went above and beyond to help me. Gaby said to me how much she wanted to help me from the beginning, as she is an amateur pianist herself and her mother was a successful concert pianist. It was a blessing to be able to have a therapist who also understands music and could guide my recovery to a musical point of view, as well as a medical one e.g. spanning the hand for chords exercises, independence of the fingers for playing thirds etc and dexterity exercises etc.
I have been used in multiple case studies and published medical journals in the NHS and internationally. Part of my recovery involved a plaster casting technique called CMMS, developed in USA but now taught globally by a specialist in South Africa via online sessions, and she has been presenting my case to train hand therapists in Africa, America, Asia and Australia. The plaster casting technique helps encourage movement of stiffened joints. It also re-trains the brain’s neurological patterns to initiate a fist correctly which was successful for me and if promoted more, could help others with similar injuries.
All the way through I have tried hard to remain positive and grateful for the outcome I have had and what was saved. It could have been a far worse. In those moments after the accident while alone I was afraid for my life and I feel positive and confident in the knowledge that life is too short to be unhappy about the past. Its been a tough road but ultimately I have grown as a person and learned that there is always something to be positive about and to smile when you feel sad. Things in life go wrong but I have learned to appreciate and love what I have, and always remember what I had.
I have now overcome most pianistic challenges that I initially thought to be unachievable. Since preparing recital programmes again I have also been asked to present a recital and motivational talk to tell the story of my accident. My first event post accident was in April 2024, a recital/ presentation talk at Durham University and I continue my career with an aim to share my journey with a new perspective through my music.
